Developing The Mindset To Become Masters In Sales And Life With Jillian Murphy

GUEST CONVERSATIONS

April 2, 2021

PTR 55 | Sales Mindset

 

Success is not just all about skills. It is predominantly about your mindset, how you take on the tasks and challenges at hand and fight your way through them. Susanne Puerschel’s guest in this episode, Jillian Murphy, is nothing short of that. Fighting her way through cancer, marathons, corporate America, and entrepreneurship with her mindset, Jillian greatly shows that having determination outweighs the skills to reach your goals. She sits down with Susanne to share with us all about her journey and how she eventually became the amazing sales coach she is now, living in her purpose and passion in serving so many people. Tune into this conversation as Jillian gives some more great mindset tips to help you become masters in sales.

 

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Developing The Mindset To Become Masters In Sales And Life With Jillian Murphy

I’m sure you guys can absolutely relate, anyone who’s reading and any dancer who’s reading this. If we want to have that perfect body or physique, we can’t be like everybody else. We have to be that 1%-er because everybody else doesn’t look like us. What do we have to do that’s so dramatic along the other way? Looking back now, there are so many things that I did to be a few pounds smaller, a little bit leaner, and a little bit tighter. I can’t even fathom it now that I look back on it. Just like you, I stay fit and active but that is no longer part of my story. It’s definitely no longer part of my worth.

Jillian, thank you so much for being on the show. I am so excited to have this conversation with you.

I am so grateful to be here. I’m your biggest fan. I’m absolutely obsessed with you. When you were like, “Do you want to come on my show?” Of course, I do. I want to speak to all of your friends on here and pour into them.

Thank you. Before we get started in any kind of direction, I want to preface how the two of us met. I was part of a women’s group and Jillian spoke in it. I knew in that moment from the energy that she set free, that I had to get to know you. I am usually not reacting that way. I’m shy and making connections but with you, it feels so good. I’m going to reach out to her, “Can you be my coach? I want to work with you.” That’s how we got to know ourselves.

It was the easiest sales conversation ever. She’s like, “I heard you speak and I want to work with you. What does that look like?” I was like, “Suzanne, can I have more of you please?” It’s been amazing because one thing that I love is I get to work with a limiting coach. There are a select few that truly become my friend and family, and you have absolutely been one of those. Even you and I took a little break for a month and I was like, “I miss you. I miss my human.”

Put your mind to anything because life isn’t about being the best. It is about having a strong mindset. Click To Tweet

What that taught me was following your gut instinct is so important. If I hadn’t reached out, we would’ve never established this beautiful relationship. As soon as the borders are open, I’m coming over.

Get over here. Get away from those boys in your house and see me.

Let’s go back not all the way but I want to share your story as much as you’re comfortable in sharing because there is so much beauty in there. You are such a strong person. It’s choosing your story. Start when in your teenage years when you had encountered your first struggle.

It was even before my teenage years. When I was six, I was diagnosed with childhood leukemia. I’m a terminally ill child at the age of six, didn’t know what I was doing, and didn’t know why all of my friends could go to school. I was in hospital rooms, hospital beds, and surgery centers. That was the foundation that set me up for the rest of my life because I remember being in the hospital room, in an ICU, and doctor coming in and saying like, “It doesn’t look good for her.” It’s so crazy that I remember this from being a child and my dad who’s very strong was like, “She’s going to be okay.”

The doctor said, “Her attitude will make or break how the rest of this goes.” From there, I had fun with cancer. I wore fun pajamas to the hospital. I had all my cancer friends in my room. We would have little pajama parties and movie nights inside of my hospital room. That set me up for the mindset of, “I was going to get through this and I was going to create this little community of other little cancer kids around me. We’re all going to soar together.”

This is the very first time in my life that I’ve ever heard somebody say, “I made cancer fun.”

I wouldn’t even wear hospital gowns. I was like, “I’m not wearing those.” I wore pajamas. I had a tent. I don’t know if you remember but back in the late ‘80s, they had those tents that would go over your children’s beds. I was like, “If I’m going to be in this hospital, then I want one of those tents.” The doctors would have to open up my tent, come in, and see me. I was going to make it as fun as I possibly could. Every time I lost my hair, I would go to the wig store and I would get a massively different color. I would go back to school and I would have long blonde hair. Six months later, I would have short red hair. A couple of months later, I would have short brown hair. I had all these wigs and I was like, “I’m going to make this as much fun as I possibly can.”

PTR 55 | Sales Mindset

Sales Mindset: Life is about being healthy and in alignment with who you are. It has nothing to do with what everybody on the outside is telling you.

 

I don’t know if it’s the only way through but it’s definitely the easier way through.

There are things that I remember that aren’t so great. If I honestly look back to having cancer, I met some of my dearest friends. I have relationships with still so many of my doctors and nurses. I did make the best out of the situation that I had at hand.

How did you end up in Corporate America?

I went to college for law enforcement. I was going to be the big, old, bad police. I was going to be the police. I was going to work in Detroit, Michigan. That was my goal. From a young age, I wanted to be a policeman. My dad is a strong businessman. I was on a golf outing with him and there was four men that were golfing ahead of us. I struck up a conversation with them. I was in my twenties and they said, “What are you going to school for?” I was like, “I’m going to be a policeman. I’m going to be a cop.” They were like, “You’ll do good in sales.”

I was like, “No, I’m all set.” I had a summer coming up and I needed some work to do. I threw out the next 15 or 16 holes, whatever it was. I struck up a conversation with these four men, and I ended up doing an internship in a sales corporation. Honestly, I fell in love with it from the day I got there. I came as an intern. I moved into customer service, from there into entry-level and then ended up leaving the company almost 22 years later as a top sales exec.

You can cry for today and be upset but tomorrow, put your bootstraps on and figure it out. Click To Tweet

Let’s not forget you were leading men only.

I was the first female inside of our sales organization since 1963. I always joke around. The first sales meeting I went to, I was 25 or 24. I walked into this board room, and it was all of these men. I remember them saying like, “Why do we have a girl here? What is she doing?” They would say things like, “We can’t swear now because there’s a girl here. We got to watch our language because now there’s a girl.” I knew from then on that I needed to pave the way for other women inside of our company. I also knew that I needed to work twice as hard as them to get to the top and I did.

There’s so much to say to that. We could get into an equality conversation here very easily. I am more interested in, why did you pick up bodybuilding or competition? That story is still so intriguing to me.

I was overweight from my early twenties. I had a daughter young at twenty years old. I was overweight from that entire point. I turned about 35 and I remember looking at my wedding pictures. I saw them and I didn’t like how I looked. I was almost 200 pounds. I’m 5’ tall. It is a lot of weight. I never thought that I was heavy. I was never one of those girls who wanted to lose weight. I was super comfortable and confident in my skin. I remember I got my wedding pictures back and there was a picture of me and my dad walking down the aisle together.

I thought to myself, “I’m bigger and wider than my dad. I’m going to go to the gym. I’m going to lose twenty pounds.” I went to the gym and I lost twenty pounds. I was like, “I can lose 30 or 40.” During that time, I had some friends that were running a marathon and I said, “I’m going to run a marathon with you guys.” They’re like, “You’ve never run, Jill. You’re not a runner.” It’s 26 miles. I was like, “I can do it.” I joined the Detroit Marathon at the finish line never running more than two miles of my entire life. I finished it.

I was literally the overweight person who finished it last. There was no water left when I finished. There was no medals left when I finished but I conquered at 26.2 miles never even running. I was like, “I know I have drive and I can do this.” I started watching these girls at my gym. They were training and they were competing, and I thought, “I want to do that. I want to try that avenue.” I did my first show. I bombed it. I did terrible. I knew I had to get back and do better. I went on to do seven shows in five years, winning the majority of the shows that I was in becoming a world-renowned bikini competitor, whatever that even means in the real world. After about five and a half years, I took a step back and now we’re up-to-date.

PTR 55 | Sales Mindset

Sales Mindset: Sales is truly the greatest job in the world. You’re just solving problems all day long while getting paid for that.

 

I want to go a little bit deeper into that because it sounds so easy. It’s fun and it’s not fun at all. Let’s talk about the marathon because that is the epitome of who you are, I believe and that’s your course like, “I said I’m going to do it, so I’m going to do it.” How did you feel when you finished that?

My friends were runners. They stayed with me for about first five minutes and then they were off. I was like, “I’m on my own.” I remember getting to the halfway mark, it was 12.2 miles, 12.6, whatever. My daughter, my parents, and my husband at that time were there and they were like, “Jill, you’re not going to last twelve more miles. Just quit. You did a half marathon. Be super proud of that.” I was like, “No. I’m going to go.” There was such a sense of accomplishment when I finished it. I relate it back to the Biggest Loser if you ever watched the Biggest Loser and there’s the last person coming across the finish line. There’s no water and no medals. People have left. People are at home taking naps by now. I finished and it made me feel so good. What it also made me do is realize that I could put my mind to anything because it wasn’t about being a runner. It’s about having a strong mindset. I got through 26 miles being a good mindset. It had nothing to do with running.

Two things I’m hearing. One is it is about 80%. In your case, 100% mindset and 0% skill. We’re saying 80% mindset, 20% skill. That’s all you need. During those over 26 miles, did you ever waver?

I didn’t. There was times I stopped and I cried. My thighs were chaffed because I was overweight and there wasn’t a lot of water left but I thought, “I can’t turn around.” I had to keep going. You have to do it and I told myself I was going to do it. I was like, “I’m going to finish this marathon. I’m going to do it.” It wasn’t like I finished it and it felt great. I wanted to quit around mile three, to be honest. I thought, “If I can do three then I’ll do one more and I’ll walk a little bit and I can do.” It was such a sense of accomplishment but it was never to the point that I thought like, “This is a lot of fun and I’m finishing it.” It was hard as hell.

You kept that promise to yourself. That is where you find grit. That’s where you can find self-esteem. You can find trust in yourself when you keep those promises to yourself.

There are people in the world that truly need the God-given talent you have. Tap into that. Click To Tweet

It’s being in corporate. I told myself, “I’m not going to be an entry-level salesperson taking this guy’s shit all the time. I’m going to get to the top. I’m going to be at the top of the sales team. I’m going to be the one getting the awards. I’m going to figure it out because I’m not going to do is sit back and let all these other people pass me by. That’s what I’m not going to do because I know my skillset is as good.” I said to figure out a way to get there. It’s mindset. I fought through cancer, marathon, Corporate America, and entrepreneurship with that mindset. Whatever the task is, if your mindset is determined, you’ll figure it out.

Let’s talk a little bit about your time during the bodybuilding bikini competition. I remember seeing pictures of you that I couldn’t even recognize who you were because you were so skinny. I understand that when we really want something, we do everything for it even though if that means hurting ourselves. I want to hear your perspective on that.

This is going to resonate with your audience as well. I know you have a lot of dancers on here that it’s about our appearance. It’s about how we look and you have to go a little bit deeper each time. A little bit thinner, leaner, and more flexible, whatever that was. Once you get on that downward spiral, it’s hard to stop. I would assume the same in the dance community but that’s who your community starts to become. It was normal for me to do those things. It was normal for me to go out to dinner, go to the bathroom, and throw up after because all of my friends at the table understood that.

You start to almost be around the same types of people. I wouldn’t necessarily say they’re encouraging your bad behaviors but they get it because they’re all doing the same thing. You can’t see how bad it is until you step out of it. During the time I was competing, it looked like I was doing all the other things as all my other friends were doing because my other friends and other family members weren’t doing it, they were the weird ones now. Me, my new bodybuilding friends, and fitness friends had it figured out. Our bodies were on point. We were getting looked at the gym.

PTR 55 | Sales Mindset

Sales Mindset: Sales is 80% mindset. If you don’t believe in yourself, your products, and your ability to solve problems, you’re going to have a really hard time giving that energy to somebody else.

 

We were winning things. I was in Shape Magazine and Oxygen Magazine. I was the poster child for our fitness shows. I was on the posters and the postcards. I was like, “There, the weirdos, I got to figure it out.” I went back to my cancer doctor. I still see him once a year. One of the last times was while I was competing. I remember he brought in a nutritionist in and he was like, “She’s going to talk to you about your diet.” I was like, “My diet is fine.” I can literally remember, she was like, “How many servings of vegetables do you have a day?” I was like, “I’m haven’t eaten vegetables in two years.” She was like, “How much dairy are you taking in?” I was like, “I haven’t had dairy for three years.” She said, “When’s the last time you had a piece of fruit?” I was like, “Fruit has sugar in it. Probably four years ago.”

She was like, “What do you eat?” I was like, “I eat rice cakes, tuna fish, a ton of shakes, tons of egg whites, and fish.” It was all it was. She was getting so frustrated with me and I was getting so frustrated with her. My hematologist came back and he’s like, “I don’t even think that you realize how much your body went through to stay alive and you’re killing yourself every single day.” I’m going to get choked up. He was like, “I remember looking at you in that bed and you fought so hard to stay alive. I’m looking at you right now and you’re not even trying that hard right now to not be healthy.” It broke me. I did one more show after that and I’ve never gone back.

We’re getting into this community and to the mindset of, “We’re only worthy of something if we are fitting in and we’re complying to whatever that is without even recognizing what we’re doing to ourselves.” Listening to your diet, I was like, “Sounds familiar.”

I’m sure anyone who’s reading and any dancer who’s reading this can relate. If we want to have that perfect body or physique, we can’t be like everybody else. We have to be that 1%-er because everybody else doesn’t look like us. What do we have to do? That’s so dramatic along the other way. Looking back now, there are so many things that I did to be a few pounds smaller, a little bit leaner, and a little bit tighter. I can’t even fathom it now that I look back on it. Same as you, I stay fit and active but that is no longer part of my story. It’s definitely no longer part of my worth.

On the other side of every sales transaction is a transformation to somebody's life. Click To Tweet

That’s so beautiful because so many people still struggle. I have to say, I’m not struggling but I’m still looking at myself with, “Maybe another five pounds. How about that, Susie, because then you look better and then this pair of jeans fits?” Forget about that. It’s about being healthy and in alignment with who you are and it has nothing to do with what everybody on your outside is telling you.

What happens is sometimes we have these conversations and people are like, “She has fat girl syndrome. Now, she’s the other way.” You can still have a normal life and balanced life. Just because you love yourself, it doesn’t mean that you’re overweight. You have a great self-body image, it doesn’t mean that you’re overweight. Trust me, I still work out six days a week. I still eat clean but if I want ice cream, I’m going to have it.

I was married at that time when I was competing and I ended up getting divorced during that time because he was like, “We haven’t been to a restaurant in three years. We haven’t been able to enjoy dessert on our anniversary. We don’t even go to bed at the same time because you’re downstairs on your spin bike. What is this?” Looking back on it, I was not only competing an expensive hobby but it’s a very selfish hobby too. I was very selfish for those five years.

What I’ve learned is there’s nothing wrong with that but if it interferes with the other person, the people that are living next to you and with you with their happiness, then it becomes selfish and selfish in not a good way.

I don’t think you see it when you’re in it. I remember going to Disney with my family and they were all going to the park. They were going to Disney at 8:00 in the morning. I don’t know what it was. I had to get my run in. The hotel gym didn’t open until 8:00. I went to Disney later in the afternoon. I didn’t see it then but now looking back on it, I was so selfish. All day at Disney, I was like, “I can’t eat here. I don’t want to eat ice cream. Can we walk faster so I can burn more calories?” There were so many things in life during those five years that I missed out on. I’ll always have a bit of regret for that but now I know moving forward that I won’t have those anymore.

Did you have a coach during that time?

I did. I had a coach. It’s interesting because he’s still my coach but I’m on a totally different meal plan. Now I’m on maintenance. I eat more intuitive eating but I had a coach. He was a male competitor coach and struck in on being lean, smaller, or all these things. That’s what I signed up for. I also think too because I had a male coach who was always judging, even though he wasn’t judging but judging how I looked and my body. I would send him my progress pictures and he’d be like, “We got to tighten up a little more there. We got to do this.” That even hurt me now in later age as I’m dating and stuff. I’m always like, “Is he judging me that I need to be a little tighter?” I started dating and the guy was like, “Do you want to Facetime?” I was like, “Yes.” I got on Facetime with him. He was like, “Would you be more comfortable taking off your shirt?” I was like, “No. I’m 40. I want to keep my shirt on. I want to keep this all on, to be honest. If you want to see some better pictures, you can Google me, but nowadays, I’ll keep it on.”

Let’s fast forward to the time when we met and that was after the pandemic hit. I remember you speaking, you’re already building your community, being a kick-ass sales coach, and then I found out, “She’s still in the corporate job.” I was like, “What?” What happened?

I’m 22 years in corporate sales. I had gone to Chris and Lori Harder’s Mastermind. I went to it. My friends were going. I’m a fluke and I’m like, “I’ll go to LA whenever.” I didn’t even know what entrepreneurs did. I was like, “What are all my friends do is so weird.” I went to that and at that mastermind, I decided I needed to get into entrepreneurship. I have a skillset, a God-given talent, that I can now share with the world. I can share my message and what I’m doing but I loved corporate. I was always somebody that said like, “I believe corporate. I’ll retire from corporate.”

My picture was around the wall. I was like, “I was the poster child,” being the first female that had not only come into the company but then worked work the way to the top. I was indestructible. I was doing very well, all the things, and all the awards. During the pandemic, we shut down our division. If you’ve been there for 22 years, you’re higher to the payroll at the top and they cut from the top down. In a matter of about seven minutes, I lost everything. I lost a company car, a six-figure plus income, and insurance. I thought to myself, “We have to figure this out.” I remember I left the building, I got in the car, and I called my dad.

My dad again is a businessman entrepreneur. I got in the car and I was like, “Dad, I lost my job.” He’s like, “You’ll figure it out. You always figure it out. You can cry and you can be upset today. Go meet your sister and have some lunch but tomorrow, put your bootstraps on and you’ll figure it out.” That day I cried. I was upset. I felt like I was kicked out of the family of corporate. The next day, I put my face on and I got to work. Since March 2020, I’ve almost doubled my income that I was making. I’ve been able to bring in a massive community. I’m living in my purpose and my passion now and serving so many other people. I would not trade it for anything in the world. The pandemic was truly the best thing that happened to me.

PTR 55 | Sales Mindset

Sales Mindset: Don’t just work with anybody. Work with people that absolutely light you up.

 

I was so surprised that you were still holding onto that job. I was like, “That’s not going to last very long.” Literally, the week after, you said, “I was, within seven minutes, let go from a 22-year job engagement.” I was like, “Thank you, universe. She’s now free to fly.”

That happens to so many of us and even some of your readers and they’re in the space right now where maybe their livelihood has been taken away, their job has been taken away, or their ability to perform has been taken away. Know that you have God-given talents or whatever it is that you believe in. The world needs them. Whether you’re the world’s best organizer, you can help people organize their closets, be more organized, write notes, sell stuff, or have a mindset. Whatever it is, you have a talent. If you start to tap into what your God-given talent is, there are people in the world that truly need that skill that you have.

You don’t have to stay within your lane. It is okay to be diverse as much as you want to. Now, let’s talk about selling and saving. I can see your face lighting up where everybody then grabs a bucket to throw up into or have some story to tell about sales. Here’s my experience that I found so far when I received resumes or anything from dancers that are active in the industry right now, that there is a definite lack on the ability to sell themselves or to stand out. Let’s not even go that far to know what you’re good at and what your worth is. It’s in you. This is your gift. How do you get that out of people?

I start by breaking it down. What lights you up? What makes you happy? What do you want to do? If you could do anything in the world. Let’s play stupid idea time. Let’s play crazy idea time. Let’s get it out. What would sound good to you? What would sound fun to you? I had a one-on-one coaching client and she thought she needed to be in one area. She thought, “This is what everyone needs.” I started talking to her and I was like, “Your God-given talent is this. There are so many people who need this.” What happens is if no one pulled it out of you or no one talked to you through it, you don’t know what you don’t know. That’s the benefit of having a coat whether it’s me, you, a mastermind, or whatever it is. There are people who can see things in you that a lot of times you can’t see.

Making that step and having that faith that you can trust in somebody else. I found that first step was the hardest because trusting other people was hard for me in the beginning. Now, I would never go without a coach in my life ever again.

It’s smart no matter what it is. It doesn’t matter if you’re trying to lose weight, you’re trying to be a better dancer, or you’re trying to make more money, whatever it is, there’s somebody out there that is either a little bit farther ahead of you. It can save you time, energy, money, or is going to be the opposite of you that is going to pull something out of you that you don’t see. Look at you and me for an example. Our demeanors and our tonalities are different but what happens is I see things in you and you see things in me. Sometimes, when we’re moving into this online space, we’re trying to gravitate to people who feel like home or you need the opposite. You need someone who is the total opposite of what you’re doing so that they can see it inside of you.

Let’s go into the philosophy and psychology of selling. What I want to know is why is it that so many people, particularly women, feel that as something yucky or it sounds salesy and I don’t want to have to do anything with it. Why are we not open to just listen?

Sales is truly an exchange of energy. It's an exchange of confidence. Click To Tweet

It’s a couple of things. A lot of people who are not confident in sales usually go back to an experience that they had when somebody was trying to sell them something and that’s what they remember sales as being. You were a female who wanted to go look at cars for the day and you wanted to bum around the car dealership. You had seventeen salesmen that were like, “What can I do? What can I get you? What can it be?” You wanted to go to the shoe department at Nordstrom’s and you wanted to look at shoes. People were like, “What can I help you with? What can I get you?” A lot of times, it’s because you’ve had someone that has sold to you in a gross icky way. That’s what you think and feel that sales is truly what it is.

Sales is the greatest job in the world. I tell people all the time, “I’m not selling anybody anything. I’m solving problems all day long. People get to pay me for it. It’s fantastic.” On the other side of every transaction that I make, I’m making a transformation to somebody’s life, whether it’s a network marketing product, a doTERRA oil, an isogenic product, or coaching. Whatever it is, you have the ability to help somebody solve a problem. Women don’t like it is when they had this resistance because they’re not sure of themselves. People naturally have a resistance about being sold to. If you have a resistance about selling and they have a resistance about buying, there’s always this weird friction that’s always going to happen.

Do you think that it also has something to do with our inability to say no?

Yes. I love this for sales. First of all, know that if you’re selling something, no matter what it is, network marketing, coaching, whatever it is, you will absolutely get more noes than you will get yeses. If you’re reading this right now and you get to know in the next couple of days, I want you to celebrate it because what the universe is telling you is that there aren’t a good fit for you. It’s opening up the space for somebody else. Also know, especially women, we can say no to things that don’t feel right. Remembering that your audience can say no to you and it’s totally okay. People say no to me every day. I was like, “That means that we’re not a good fit together right now. Maybe it would be a better fit down the road.” If somebody is trying to sell me something and I’m not interested in it, I have no problem saying no. I say, “Not right now.”

Let’s take me for an example because I was that person that definitely had every hang-up around sales you can ever imagine. What are the three things that you would tell somebody that comes out of the yucky waters of unworthiness because that’s what it felt for me to break through that and to make progression? What are three things that they could start with?

I would say the first thing is know that sales is again 80% mindset. If you don’t believe in yourself, your products, your company, and your ability to solve problems, you’re going to have a hard time giving that energy to somebody else. Remind yourself every morning or every night that you are a problem-solver and that the world needs you. Another thing you can do is start to speak to yourself some greatness because sales is confidence. Sales is truly an exchange of energy back and forth. It’s an exchange of confidence. You want to be confident in them and they want to be confident in you.

You need to start getting confident about yourself and what it is that you do. Those are the two biggest things. The third thing that I tell everybody is celebrate the noes. It’s absolutely okay. Know that you’re going to be told no, everybody is not for that you, and you don’t have to sell to everybody. What happens is we think that we have to be selling all the time and sales is a relationship. Start to think about what it is that you have and what is it you’re doing. Remember that you’re not selling anybody anything. You’re cultivating relationships. That’s all you’re doing.

That will help you. That what happens is we go into sales trying to sell. Remember, there’s a resistance around that other person to buy and we’re trying to sell. It’s never going to be good. There’s almost a sales thermostat that you have to set. You’re excited, you have programs, products, services, whatever it is so you’re coming in hot. Your audience is cold. You have to chill out and then let your audience warm-up so you guys can meet in the middle. During this time that you’re chilling out, you’re getting to know them. You’re asking questions. Figure it out if they are a good fit for you and know that not everybody is going to be a good fit. That’s totally okay.

The world's always changing. We never know what's going to be there. So make sure you're able to pivot. Click To Tweet

It doesn’t say that your bad, unworthy, or your ego gets in the way. It’s simply not yet.

One of the things that I say every morning to myself is that people get to work with me. I’m not going to beg or convince anybody to work with me. I’m not going to try to sell somebody on my program. They get to work with me. There’s a little bit of arrogance and confidence around that but when somebody tells me that I’m not a good fit, I’m okay because I’m probably not a good fit for you either. It’s that inner confidence that we have to have with sales especially if you’re selling through a dominant personality because they will run all over you if you are not in a space of confidence.

I want to add to that. I don’t think it has something to do with arrogance. Arrogance for me is not a good word but if you’re secure, you know who you are, and you know what you’re standing for, that is not arrogance. That is good self-esteem that everybody should have. If we all would have that kind of self-esteem, we wouldn’t be talking about this now at all.

It’s true no matter what it is. I’ll give you a good example. I’m very confident in sales. I’m very confident that I can solve problems. I’m confident I can bring money into your business. I’m confident that I can get you past limiting beliefs but because I’m competent in that one area of my life, it doesn’t mean I’m competent in all the areas of my life. As I told you, I’m in this dating space now. I’m way less confident in that space than I am in the selling space. Knowing that building that confidence up is a muscle. It’s an absolute muscle that we have to work out like dancers, fitness competitors, or whatever. It’s a confidence that you have to work up into.

Where are you at now? You have this huge community now that has almost 800 people in it. You have a mastermind, and you do one-on-one coaching.

I do lots of things. What I learned was that there are people in all different stages of their sales process. There are some people who are in network marketing and they’ve never sold anything. All they know is that they’re getting some gross copy-paste messages from corporate and they don’t know how to sell. You don’t want to have a program for entry-level salespeople. They’ve never done much of anything, they’re not confident on social media, how to sell, and not sure how to break past those limiting beliefs.

That’s my signature program. From there, I have a monthly membership if people want to be in community with me and learn sales, and have access to me to pick my brain as I like to call it. I do have a sales mastermind that I launch twice a year. High achieving women and this is women more in that coaching space, higher-level entrepreneurs, higher-level network, and marketers that are good at business but now they’re trying to become masters in sales. I have some one-on-one spots, which is what you and I do, which I love. I keep it open to the people with who I truly want to be in the community with.

That’s a good lesson for the readers. Know that your one-on-one coaching clients will take energy from you. It will be the biggest part of your day, so make sure it’s a good fit. Don’t work with anybody. Work with people that absolutely light you up and you are so excited when you see their name on your books. I’m so excited when I see your book. I’m like, “She’s here.” What you don’t want is to be in a one-on-one spot where you’re looking at your books and then it’s not fun. You should be having fun in life. You should be having fun in entrepreneurship. That’s what it’s all about. That’s why you’re in entrepreneurship.

Is that why we’re entrepreneurship?

Everyone has their own reasons. I would encourage you to go back to your core values if you’re reading this. Why did you get into it? Did you get into it for fun, for freedom, for income, for impact, to make a difference, or to retire your husband? What were your core values that got you into it? Make sure that you’re building your business around your core values.

That’s the most important thing. Build your business whatever it is that you’re doing. Build it around what matters to you. What is your north star? What do you want to achieve in life? I find that so much, particularly in the arts world that we’re forgetting what that why is, who we’re serving, who are we giving to, and we’re so selfish in not a good way.

Do you think that you guys have forgotten about it because you’ve been doing it for so long?

I think not because we’ve been doing it so long or they have been doing it so long. It’s because the pain of what they think it should take in order to become has taken over the joy.

How many dancers do you think that once they get to a spot of top-level, love dancing? Remembering what it’s like to put those shoes on and be obsessed with dancing.

I don’t know the answer. I can look around right now and I can point at 3 or 4 that are completely in alignment and everybody else is fighting on a consistent basis. I have been there. I have been fighting for many years regardless to where I was. If I was a dancer, when I was in corporate, even when I had my very own first business, I was fighting. Fighting to be seen and to be successful. This is the first time in my life where things feel easy even though it is uncomfortable to deal with my shit but I don’t want to have it any other way.

I watch it. I’m in it. I see it. That’s why your community is so lucky to have you because you’ve been through it. You’re almost putting your arm around the women and the men in your community and you’re like, “We got this. We can do it.” That’s so great that you’ve stepped into that leadership role inside of your community and even on your show and stuff because there are so many people I know in your space that need you.

Thank you. They’ll know soon too.

They know that you just haven’t said it yet. They know they need a little Susie in their life. They haven’t decided yet. That’s okay. You’re going to love them where they’re at.

With what you know right now, what would you tell your sixteen-year-old self? What would you tell her?

I would tell her a couple of things. I would tell her not to put all of her eggs in one basket regardless of what it is because the world changes consistently. The world is always changing. We never know what’s going to be there. I hate this word but make sure you’re able to pivot. Make sure you’re able to have multiple streams of income. I would also say to my sixteen-year-old self like, “Don’t take your life so seriously. You think at sixteen that this is all it is. Have fun. Create great memories.” Do all of those things because life is short and you never know when it’s over. Look at what we’re going through right now. Who would have thought a year ago that this would be our world? Enjoy what you have when you have it. I remember going to restaurants and being so annoyed that I had to wait an hour. Now, I would do anything to eat at a restaurant. It’s remembering the goodness when you have it.

I was lying. It’s not the last question I wanted to talk to you about the multiple streams of income. You and I, I’m assuming that you grew up at the same time that I was, and everything was around steps. You have your corporate job, you make this amount of money, this is what you can have, this is what you save, you buy your house, and so on. We never talked about the other way around, meaning what do I want to earn and how do I get there. What I see in the arts very much and where I came from is like, “This is your salary. You get paid for the next 7 or 8 months. Make it work.” We did but what it did to us was it kept us so small in our thinking, mindset, and abilities. It didn’t leave room for us to dream, grow, or learn. It took away the ability to learn to, quite honestly, invest in ourselves even the belief that we’re worthy to invest in ourselves. When did you learn about multiple streams of income?

I learned about multiple streams of income the day that I lost my corporate job. I thought to myself, “This is going to be interesting because my income went away.” When I walked out of my corporate office that day, I told myself two things. I will never be in a situation that if one stream of income goes away, my lifestyle has to change. I will figure something out. Maybe I need to do network marketing, do multiple coaching, have a side gig, or bartend one coaching. Whatever it is, I will never ever have one stream of income. I also told myself that I will never work for somebody else that has the ability to take away my income.

Back to that sixteen-year-old self because when we’re younger and in our 20s, we think we’re invincible. What do you think would be the cared for that generation? Particularly artists who believe that they have to give it all the time. Life is very serious and if they don’t take their art serious or themselves serious, they’re not going to make it whatever that looks like. How do we open that door so we can let the light so they can see what they’re missing out on?

This is what I tell my daughter all the time. She’s in that same age bracket, “Quit trying to fit into a mold to make other people happy. Quit trying to look like every other girl on social media, quit trying to talk like every other girl on social media, and quit trying to follow the trends in social media. If you don’t want to wear high-waisted pants, don’t wear high-waisted pants because that’s what everybody thinks.” Starting to figure out who you are and what makes you happy because in 3, 4, 5 years, no one is going to care. I feel like the sixteen-year-old self and these younger children spend so much trying to fit in and do what everyone else is doing.

It doesn’t matter at all. That’s a missing piece that a lot of people don’t have. Social media is killing that generation of people. That’s a whole another episode but that’s what it is because they’re finding their worth in posting, likes, shares, and everything. I have a daughter who’s on TikTok. If she posts a video and if 100 people don’t love it, she takes it down. “Did you have fun doing that video?” She’s like, “Yes but nobody liked it.” Did you have fun doing it? Did you like it? Do you think it was funny? They’re always yearning for this acceptance from everybody else. You need to accept yourself first.

You have to accept yourself first because if you don’t, nobody else will. I learned that the hard way about ten years into my career. That was a very beautiful closing-my-job moment. Thank you so much.

Thank you so much. If you guys are not obsessed with Susie yet, you need to be. She is a total breath of fresh air. I’m obsessed with her. I am so grateful for her, her community, and everything that she is pouring into you guys. It makes me want to be a dancer so I could have you leave me because you’re amazing.

My heart is jumping outside, on the outside, on the table. Thank you. You’re on Instagram under @JillianMurphy. Go check her out. Her posts are amazing. It applies to anybody. Sales is not about giving somebody something or convincing somebody to something. For me, it’s all about mindset and we all need a good daily dose of a fresh mindset.

Thank you for having me. I’m so grateful to be on here. My heart is full for you. Thank you so much.

Right back at you. I love you, girl. Thank you guys for reading.

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About Jillian Murphy

PTR 55 | Sales MindsetJillian Murphy is insanely passionate about empowering females in sales in a way that brings in simplicity & authenticity. She began her career in sales 22 years as an entry-level sales rep having no clue how to do it but knew how to build relationships and connections. She was the first female hired into her organization of over 35 men sales reps and knew she wanted to be a leader. In 22 years she has sold over 100 million in sales, piloted 2 brands from idea to execution within her sales company, lead a team of over 100 sales professionals and in March moved to the online space because she saw the need for women to be more confident in selling which leads to more income and impact!

When not working alongside women online, Jillian can be found participating in masterminds, networking events to always continue learning & growing, being a mom to both her daughter and her rescue pup!

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  — Susanne shares a quick thought that came to her after hearing a quote. Who told you that you are not deserving of what you want? She remembers how this feeling showed up in her life and how other people’s limiting thoughts would so easily be accepted as hers. Watch the episode here: Listen to the podcast here:   Who told you that you are not deserving of what you want? And I’m back. […]

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Past Episodes 

There is a better way to pursue ballet at the professional level. Instead of dancers pushing beyond their body’s limits, there is a healthier way to train your body, your mind and your spirit to soar. To become the best at your craft, you must be healthy. The mentality of surviving to make a performance perfect is an old paradigm that needs to change. As athletes, dancers must thrive in order to shine and connect with their audience. This new approach, leads to fulfillment, strength and longevity. It allows you to give more of your heart and soul on stage, creating an unforgettable experience that moves your audience. And that’s the whole pointe. 

THE POINTE TO RISE MANIFESTO