Holding A Space Of Acceptance For Ourselves Through Dance With Taylor Behringer

GUEST CONVERSATIONS

May 14, 2021

PTR 74 | Space Of Acceptance

 

Our bodies contain so much wisdom that could help us go through life. We need only to learn how to listen to them. What better way to do that than through dance? Taylor Behringer is a life-long dancer, mom, healer, and dance educator who specializes in helping professional dancers heal their relationship with their bodies. She guides dancers in using the wisdom of their own bodies to shed the beliefs and programming that puts them at war with their body and create a new way of living. She sits down with Susanne Puerschel to discuss the kind of work she is doing and the journey that led her to who she is now. Taylor taps into her struggles of perfectionism and learning how to hold a space of acceptance and compassion for herself. Extending this to others, she talks about how we can start our healing journey by learning how to accept who we are, overcome ego and pain, and create change.

 

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Holding A Space Of Acceptance For Ourselves Through Dance With Taylor Behringer

Our guest is Taylor Behringer. We met online. Taylor is a lifelong dancer, mom, healer, and dance educator, who specialized in helping professional dancers to heal their relationship with their bodies. She is a certified Breathwork Facilitator, as well as a somatic food and body coach, who guides dancers in using the wisdom of their bodies to shed the beliefs and programming that puts them to war with their body to create a new way of living and dancing that supports their relationship with their bodies.

From my own experiences, I can say how important is this kind of work is. How much I would have benefited from that with having struggles with my own eating disorders in different ways. I may have not been hospitalized over it, however, in every possible way in the dance world, some strange relationship or order with food and our bodies are programmed into the training that we’re still experiencing. Having this conversation is important to me and to her to find something that will make a difference. Enjoy the episode.

Taylor, thank you so much for being on the show. I appreciate you reaching out and saying, “Let’s record a podcast episode. I want to offer some wisdom of what I have learned.” I can’t tell you how much I appreciate you making that step and asking those questions. It’s not something that I particularly see happening a lot in the industry that we’re in.

Thank you so much for having me. I’m excited to be here and be able to share my story and everything that I learned. I hope that whoever reads this can at least get some type of a permission slip to dive deeper into their healing.

Take us back to when you were little and when did you start dancing? How did this come about? I also want to explore why are you doing what you’re doing?

I started dancing when I was three years old. I grew up as the typical studio dancer and trained hard. I knew that I wanted to be a dancer from a young age. Dance was always a huge part of my heart. It was extremely special to me, which is why I was able to commit to dance while also doing this healing work. It’s because dance has a very special place in my heart. As I grew up as a studio dancer, I started to pick up a few things from the industry that started to hinder my relationship with my body.

The perfectionism, the always needing to prove myself. Those were a few of the things that started to take a toll as I grew older into my teenage years. I didn’t realize at that time how screwed my relationship with my body became until I had my son at nineteen years old. I got pregnant young. This was my wake-up call because my whole life, I dedicated myself to dance and then I got pregnant, had him. I came to the point in my life where everything shifted and I couldn’t have the “live dancer lifestyle” that I had before, at least at that time when he was a newborn. Everything shifted and became this awakening or turning point where I had to ask myself, “Who am I without dance?”

I realized how identified with being a dancer I was, and how that was hindering my relationship with myself and my body because it wasn’t just identifying as a dancer, it was identifying with all of the beliefs and all of the constructs and the survival patterns that we develop as dancers growing up. There’s this turning point where it sounds like it was like a split second, but it was a long process of me coming to these realizations and doing the work. I started to realize that if I wanted to still dance, I had to start learning how to hold a different space for myself.

We're always on a healing journey of remembering who we are without the constructs of society. Click To Tweet

My body didn’t look the same as it did pre-pregnancy. My life didn’t look the same as other dancers my age and if I wanted to keep dancing, I had to start to learn how to hold more space of acceptance for myself and a space of compassion. I realized that I didn’t even know how to do those things at the time. I did not know how to hold compassion for myself and still dance. I didn’t know how to accept my body exactly where it was and still dance and do what I love.

I realized that there’s not a lot of spaces that are teaching these things and I went out on my healing journey. I did, do, and will always be doing my work because it’s constantly a healing journey. We’re always on a healing journey of remembering who we are without the constructs of society and the dance industry and all the things. Through that process, I got certified in a couple of different modalities and had this desire to start bringing it into the dance world because it completely changed my life, my relationship with my body, and my relationship to dance.

What resonated so strongly with me is the, “Who am I without dancing?” I believe that a lot of dancers, particularly in the classical ballet world, struggle with that. That the identification of oneself lays on who they are in the studio, who is seeing them and not seeing them, and how skinny they are and that’s the wrap. I’m sure that there are more factors to it but if we’re looking from 30,000 feet, that’s what I’m seeing and that’s what I was. You, taking that step, what a blessing your child was for giving you that in that early part of your life. It took me way longer than that to have the realization of, “What was I doing? Why didn’t I know all of these things?”

I don’t know if I would be where I am in my healing journey and being able to feel at home in my body if it wasn’t for the awakening that I had having him, and it wasn’t this beautiful process, it was messy and painful. My identity as a dancer felt like it was dying but I’m thankful that it happened when I was so young and I could live out this purpose of helping other dancers find their bodies. I like to speak on how it appears or how the constructs appear with other dancers in the studio.

Before we go into what you’re doing and the topic everybody wanted to dive into, I feel or what I’ve seen so far is that the dancing generation doesn’t even know that there is more around dance than their body itself. It goes with a lot of other layers deeper and for you to step into the realization, “I have to go and do something, I have to go get help,” is such a huge step outside of the known and outside of the comfort zone. I’d love you to go a little bit deeper into how that came about if you remember.

It’s an interesting story. I had a lot of roundabouts and it guided me to where I’m supposed to be but honestly, I didn’t know anything was wrong until it was smacked into my face. Until I was in so much emotional pain and suffering with my own body and not being able to do something about it. In the past, before I had my son, I would feel this way, and then I would do something about it. I would work out and push myself hard in the studio. I would stay later and wake up earlier and do more. It was, “How can I solve this problem through ignoring what’s going on internally and pushing myself externally?”

When I had my son, it started to flip. I don’t think I realized that I needed help right after I had him. I know I want to pursue something special, still dance, and I want to help people. I had this big desire to help people but I didn’t know I needed help at the time. I started to explore this world of healing modalities and be able to help people because I didn’t know where my life was going after I had my son because everything got flipped around. As I started to explore how I could help people, I realize that I need a lot of help because of my relationship with myself and my body, I can’t even hold space for other people and for myself. It was the journey of trying to learn to help other people, which we can relate to teaching dance or choreographing.

We can’t hold healthy space for other people until we do our work. It was in that journey of trying to be better my ability to help other people or serve other people that I realized I need to start doing deeper work for myself. After that, I started to begin my own healing journey and commit to myself and my body and it was still about helping other people, but it was more about serving myself first so that I can go and help other people and getting to know myself better. It was a lot of roundabouts. It’s like, “I’m going this direction so that I can like be the best that I could be,” and then the spirit was like, “Nope, you need to do your work.”

PTR 74 | Space Of Acceptance

Space Of Acceptance: We get to choose to take ownership of our own bodies and our own healing. Nobody else can do that for us.

 

I want to pick that out because we dancers often forget that if their cup wasn’t full or overflowing, nothing is going to come out. Nothing good or great or their full potential is going to come out. The industry pushes its participants to surf from empty cups, that’s the message. In the twelve-hour days, the hundred Nutcracker performances, all of that requires serving from an empty cup and we haven’t figured out, particularly in professional scenes, how that cup was being refilled.

Even by the companies, like, “What are we giving those people so they can give to the audience?” It’s that give and take. It doesn’t fit together. You were talking about emotional pain. How did that show up? What did that look like? We can label emotional pain in different ways and it looks different for all of us. Sometimes we don’t even know that it is emotional pain until somebody points a finger. If you’re willing to share, I’ll put my two bits in as well, but what is emotional pain, or what does that look like for you?

In the beginning, the way that I recognized it was the pain of, I didn’t feel like I belonged in the dance community anymore in the body that I had. If I were to dig down deeper, I don’t think I felt that in my entire life. There was always this fight inside of me like, “I’m not good enough,” so I have to keep pushing and keep proving and a lot of dancers relate to that. My lifestyle doesn’t fit what the definition of a dancer’s lifestyle should be. There was a lot of emotional pain around not belonging and it was like, “I don’t even belong in my body. This shouldn’t be how it is. I’ve worked my whole entire life and I shouldn’t be feeling this.”

As I dug deeper, there were more details within what was showing up inside of my body and I could get down into, “This pain is from the guilt that I learned how to feel from this situation or this pain was from my people pleaser and always trying to prove itself. This pain is the perfectionism in me.” There’re all those little details that we get into as we dig deeper inside of ourselves and give ourselves the safety to dig deeper and that started to come into play and that’s what we go to heal.

I can only share it now from my perspective, looking back. I did not know it at that time. For me, emotional pain showed up by people-pleasing and I went into abusive relationships. To be seen and to be heard and to get that love that I was looking for, it created that emotional trauma and that emotional pain that I was used to for the past years. I looked for recreating my subconscious beliefs over and over again and it showed up in smoking a pack and a half of cigarettes. It showed up in taking sleeping pills and drinking copious amounts of alcohol nights before performances and then showing up just before the show and being completely hungover. Manipulating every chance that I had to prove myself I’m not worthy.

That’s something, I want to speak to and I can relate to. I didn’t share this before, but I’ll share this now, the way that this emotional pain was showing up for me in my normal life was through abusive relationships and toxic relationships, even at a young age. I always say that there are a lot of results that happen from the internal abuse that we face as dancers and it doesn’t show up in our dancing. Normally we don’t even see it in our dancing or in the studio. It’s just normal, but there are these outcomes that happen every single day of our life that start to come forward.

For me, it was abusive relationships as well as toxic relationships. It was also using every opportunity I had to manipulate the situation so that I could be seen and try to prove myself, whether that was through my body looking a certain way and through my romantic relationships. I was always trying to manipulate the situation so that it could not be seen because there was a part of me that wanted to be accepted, seen, and loved. I wasn’t getting that from the place that I wanted it from, which was the dance industry.

I think it is so beautiful and it makes it worthy that all the pain we are experiencing in our past, there’s a reason for it. We can make it our superpower. We can make it our own and turn it around and use it, not only to heal us, but also providing a pathway and guidance for others to take it as an example of how they can heal themselves. From what I’m hearing from you is that you have tapped into that power. You’re using your past wounds to learn from them, heal them and guide others on how to heal them as well. We always have a choice. You have the choice to be the victim and ask, “Why me? Why do I have to roll around in that mud puddle and never get up,” or you choose to, “No, I am not defeated by this. This is not happening to me. It’s happening for me. Therefore, I’m going to use it and make my pain my power.” Thank you for doing that.

We can't hold a healthy space for other people until we do our own work. Click To Tweet

Thank you for seeing me. I wanted to say really quick, I love this and it’s something that I’ve been thinking about a lot. The victim in us, that starts to form as dancers, the dance industry is doing this to me and the space I was in is doing this to me. There is a realness to that, maybe the space you’re in was unsafe and something did happen in that space, but there’s also the fact that we get to choose to take ownership of our own bodies and our own healing and nobody else can do that for us. The minute that we choose that, we’re loosening the grip from the dance industry and the grip from the spaces that maybe didn’t treat us how we should have been treated.

We’re not giving them the power anymore to take ownership over us, we’re now taking ownership over our own body for creating sovereignty in our own body. That’s the message that I feel passionate about sharing. Especially right now when things are coming up and awakening and people are starting to see what’s happening, I feel like sometimes we’re stuck in that, “They did this to me.” Yes, they did and yes, they’re in the wrong, and also, we can’t stay in that dynamic. We have to first, take ownership over what’s happening internally in order to heal the dance industry as a whole truly.

Can we just go there for a second? This is so good because it is always a two-way street and I’m saying that loudly because I was that person blaming everybody else. I was blaming my directors, my teachers, and everybody involved for me not getting where I wanted to get or for being anorexic or for having problems. I had to become honest with myself and I started my own healing journey that, “Yes, it was them asking me and them telling me but it’s also me reacting to what they’re asking me to do.” If I don’t know my power, what I’m capable of, I don’t know who I am, what I stand for and where I want to go, then that’s on me. That has nothing to do with them.

I had no boundaries and this is where the fear comes in, but if I have boundaries, if I tell them no, then they will fire me and take the next dancer that will not be reluctant to their views that are being offered to me. That might be true, but what is it worth? Is it worth your sanity, health, spiritual, mental, and physical health? If it was years ago, I would’ve answered. “It’s worth everything.” I didn’t see myself and I didn’t think I was worthy of feeling great and that’s where it starts. It starts with us. With every single person understanding your superpowers and what they’re great for and why they’re here. Why they’re doing what they’re doing, and where their boundaries are.

Here’s something I’ve been exploring. Who am I actually dancing for? I still have all those people pleaser parts that come in and I try to prove myself or I try to take a class and be seen. I still have those parts. It’s a constant healing journey. When it comes down to it, even in the past before I had my son and came into the space, I could have asked myself the same thing. Who am I dancing for? I’m dancing because I truly am passionate about dancing and I love to dance and I want to be able to pursue this, but at the end of the day, I’m dancing for myself because I love this.

I wouldn’t have put myself through all that stuff if I didn’t love it, let’s face that. Also, we get to choose that, “I’m dancing for myself.” When it comes down to it, it doesn’t matter what those people out there are doing. It just matters what I’m doing and what I’m intentionally choosing. I want to say intentionally choosing and being able to separate yourself from spaces that may be harmful or having that sense of sovereignty and that sense of choice can be challenging and triggering. This is why, it’s important to create safety in your body before you go out and voice that to the outside world because we should be able to hold that space of self-worth inside of ourselves before we expect anybody else to hear us.

A great mentor of mine said, “Ego is your biggest overhead.” I had to go inside and understand that even dancing, after a while, was coming from a place of ego. Meaning that everything that I did out of fear of not being seen or what I did to manipulate myself or the tantrums or the eating disorders, it was all because of my ego. I was my personal biggest overhead and when he pointed that out, I was like, “You’re so right.”

My entire castle fell down in the sand and I restarted the building up and was like, “What does that look like serving me and others?” “What if I would have made the dance not about my fears, my perfectionism, and my fear of not being good enough or my feet not being worked enough or my legs not being high enough, but what if I have made it about the people that came to see me or to see the performance?” I never made it about them, giving them something a part of my soul, a part of me to create emotions in them because that’s why they’re coming and I never made that connection.

I can 100% relate to that, even doing and guiding this work on sometimes feel like my ego will show up and I’ll try to show myself off, like look at the things I can do. It still shows up even when you’re doing this work, but I can relate to that in my dancing. I face the same thing. It always occurred in myself. It was always so I could be seen, it wasn’t that I could share my heart, my vulnerability, or my humanness. It was for I could prove to whoever was watching that I was good enough because I didn’t believe in myself.

PTR 74 | Space Of Acceptance

Space Of Acceptance: We should be able to hold that space of self-worth inside of ourselves before we expect anybody else to hear us.

 

In order to be able to, I don’t want to say detach from the ego, a lot of people say like detach from the ego or ignore the ego, but the ego is a part of us and that ego needs love and acceptance as well. In order to not have the ego control you, there has to be this relationship with self, where you accept yourself and you see yourself as enough, then from there, you can also see everybody else was enough. It’s become this level playing field of nobody’s higher than me and nobody’s underneath me. We’re all here and we can share our hearts and share our vulnerability with each other through our arts.

I love that, but isn’t vulnerability something that was never allowed? I’m going to use that as a pivot point but that’s definitely something that I have so much shame about who I was and what I was capable of, that never in a million years would I ever show up as that person ever. Let’s talk about pain, I’m going there because I was looking on your personal Instagram account and this post particularly resonated with me so much that it brought up some old stories around the pain that I believe is important that we’re talking about it. Here is where I’m at with pain, but with the discovery through my upbringing and my career as a professional ballet dancer in Europe and North America. “Pain was always something that we seek for validation to be good enough, or to be working hard enough or the ticket to success.”

I have to say that even in my corporate career, pain was in a different level and pain showed up differently than I did as a dancer. However, it was still pain, yet again, was the sign that I was searching for to get the ticket to success, to climb the ladder, to be the manager, to be the district manager, to have the six-figure salary, all of this. It was driven by how much pain I can endure. I feel that is definitely something that still comes out in the teaching of some teachers, which is, it has to hurt. If you can’t endure pain, if you can’t be resilient to the pain mentally or physically, then you’re not a fit for the industry. Now, can you elaborate a little bit? Let’s talk a little bit around what actually brought this to life. Talk about it because not many people talk about pain.

I feel like it’s a subject when we are on the journey of healing our relationship to our body or on some type of a healing journey as dancers, it doesn’t get touched upon because it’s like, “I need pain in order to be a dancer. I need to feel pain in order to be good enough.” We don’t talk about it because we don’t think there’s a way to be a dancer and not have pain. This is what I feel, this is what I think and this is my perspective. It’s not that we don’t feel pain, we’re human beings and we feel pain. Pain is real, pain exists and pain is actually our biggest teacher. Emotional pain and physical pain are our teacher.

That’s our body crying out to us, that there’s something that we need to get, or it’s our body’s saying, “Take care of me, pay attention to this, stop ignoring it and stop pushing it down.” When it comes to the physical pain that we face as dancers, I feel that pain is like growth. We can’t grow if we’re not going to feel uncomfortable in pain. The thing that we’re missing in the dance industry is the safety to feel the pain without identifying with the story of the pain. That means the story that you were talking about earlier, “Pain means I’m enough. If I’m not feeling pain, then I’m not enough.” We identify with that story and then that creates the suffering in the body.

We’re stuck in this loop of emotional suffering now that we need pain in order to be enough and that’s not the truth. Pain is just a transition point into the next awakening, into the next space of growth. It’s a transition point and we don’t always have to be in pain in order to be enough. We have to begin to teach our bodies what enough is without the pain first. Teach our bodies that I am enough and I’m safe to be enough without feeling pain.

When we have that platform to feel safe without feeling pain, we can then go and grow. We can then feel pain as growth and we can listen to our bodies of how we can support ourselves best, as we grow. Holding your leg up, you’re going to feel pain because that’s growth, that’s your muscle getting used to it, but we’re not addicted to the suffering of pain that we’ll do anything at any cost to be enough and that’s what we want to start to heal, that addiction to pain.

That it is an addiction as well, it’s an emotional addiction that produces certain types of endorphins or hormones that we teach our body that we need in order to feel a certain way. Let’s go a little deeper, I’m going to give you an example of what I discovered about myself in terms of pain and suffering, I created my environment as a suffering environment because that’s how I thought, my mother, who I looked for love so much and not received it in a way that I needed to, would see me. Me not being aware of it, I kept on creating the same thing over and over again through that place and even in my job, I created it.

Pain is real, pain exists, and pain is actually our biggest teacher. Click To Tweet

I either hurt myself and said, “No, I can still dance,” just to get the attention through the suffering and through the pain that I do to myself. Not having the guts to say, “That isn’t serving me, I’m going to give myself even more pain in the long term if I don’t step up right now.” What I realized was that it was my default. It was my safe place, it was my home to create the suffering and even when it didn’t exist anymore, I was still looking for it.

I was always rolling in the, “I’m not enough, I can’t do this.” “I’m not in that kind of space,” which was the emotional pain that I went through itself or gave myself and giving myself the permission that, “Happiness can be easy and success can be easy.” Everything in life can be fun and easy and coming from a place of joy, as long as I’m choosing it to be. It doesn’t mean that they’re not hard days. It doesn’t mean that it doesn’t hurt emotionally or physically. I’m just looking at it from a completely different perspective.

Thank you for being vulnerable with me and sharing that because I faced a similar situation with exploring this for myself. I feel like when it comes to this whole situation and being a dancer in order to be able to live a life where you feel free. Where you feel free to be yourself and you feel like you belong in your body, your body is your home. You’re not at war with your body anymore, there has to be a detachment from dance. I don’t mean stop dancing, there has to be a detachment from your identity as a dancer. Identity as a dancer is the perfectionism. It’s like the, “I need the pain in order to be enough,” that’s the identity.

Dance alone is not bad, wrong, or hurting you. It’s the identity and the constructs around the concept of being a dancer that begins to separate us from our true innate worth and our innate ability to feel happy and to be free in our bodies. You can have that feeling at the same time as dancing if you separate the two. We have to get to a place of, “I’m human and I am me. I’m innately worthy and deserving of all of those happiness and freedom and joy in my body. I can choose to do the action of dance.” Instead of, “I am a dancer, I have to do all of these things to be a dancer.” It’s like, “This is me. I am me.” “I’m at home when I’m me.” From this space, I can choose to do actions that support my desire of dancing and it’s like a whole different perspective shift. It’s a whole different energy that you come at dancing from. That shift is internal. There’s no changing anything on the external world. It’s internal and it’s very slight and nobody’s going to feel it but you and you get to dive into this yourself.

When we’re talking about healing, who are your coaches? Let’s get there first because it is so important. I will never ever be without a mentor or coach in real life ever again. There’s always something that I want to learn. There’s always somebody that I want in my life that can hold that space for me to cry my eyes out or to celebrate my wins with or to just dream ridiculously big or to feel like, “Today is not the day to talk to you at all.” I always want to have that person in my life, and I know that coaches provide that space or masterminds or communities, etc. Who was your first coach? How did you start?

I wouldn’t be where I was or where I am emotionally without them. I believe that everybody needs somebody in their corner for them to support them, that’s like unconditionally supporting them and the piece that changed my life was having somebody/community to hold that unconditional space of like, “You could mess up, you could do anything and we’re still going to love you and still see you for who you are.” That completely changed everything for me. My first coach was actually a business coach, her name is Rachel Symington. She’s a business coach, but she teaches a lot on the feminine and how to have pleasure when you’re running a business or doing any kind of serving work.

That was a big transition for me because I was coming from the state of constantly hustling and pushing my worth all the time and it was this awakening point of like, “You don’t have to do that because you’re already worthy.” That was my first one and then as I moved into healing modalities and exploring different certifications and who’s also my mentor, Samantha Skelly. She has completely changed my life. I owe her everything because, just like the space that she held for me to transform my life has been unconditional and she’s my breathwork and my energy worker teacher. All of these tools that I have and have been learning from her or her community that she provided me. Having a community behind me and supporting me unconditionally has been transformational.

My colleagues, my peers, and also my clients, I’m constantly learning from everybody. Even the people who am I “serving” it’s a co-creation process. I’m learning from my clients every single day and I’m learning from the people around me every single day. I am a part of the DanceSafe, it’s an organization that deals with abuse in the dance industry. I work with them and it’s this beautiful community that supports true healing in the dance community and I learned so much from them about how to hold different spaces in the dance industry.

PTR 74 | Space Of Acceptance

Space Of Acceptance: To not have the ego control you, there has to be this relationship with self, where you accept yourself and see yourself as enough.

 

Where are they located?

Located online, virtually. You can find them on Instagram. The point that I’m trying to get across here is that we get to learn from everybody. Having those people, having that coach or facilitator or that leader in your corner is so transformational and needed but it’s important to surround yourself with a variety of people, with a variety of experiences to hold different spaces for you.

On a side note, I think you will love Christine Hassler. She’s my hero. What are you doing? What are you offering? Where can we find you?

I’m enrolling in The Evolved Dancer Program. This is a five-month group program and it’s for the dancers who truly want to begin to heal their relationship with their body. What’s exciting about this round is I’m making it more accessible to any dancer who wants to heal their relationship with their body through different pricing plans and different tiers. There’re ways where you can get super deep and like one-on-one support. There’s a tier where you can get a little bit less support but it’s still affordable if you’re in a space where you truly want to heal and you want to begin that journey but you’re not in a space to invest the time and money into it.

The Evolved Dancer Program, it’s all about healing your relationship to your body while still pursuing dance. We dive into the somatics of healing, which is healing your body and healing the trauma that has happened inside of your body. A lot of coaches and therapy happens from your mind. It’s talk therapy, you’re talking and you’re wrapping yourself up in your story kind of thing. What I love to do is, I love to take dancers down into their bodies where the trauma lies and that’s the work that we do in The Evolved Dancer program.

I’m actually running a workshop and I’m going to be holding another workshop closer to the start date of The Evolved Dancer Program. One more thing, I’m opening up space to start doing workshops for different dance companies. If you’re a dance company and you want to bring resources and support, like some actual support for your dancers to keep going through this pandemic and all of these things, I’m offering some workshops here and there as well to support other dance communities.

If you could start over again, as in rebirth, what would be two things that you learned so far that you would do differently?

I don’t know if I would start over because everything that I learned is because of everything that I’ve experienced. It’s the permission slip to be myself without trying to prove myself and that goes into dancing. The way that I move my body, the way that I express myself, and the way that I speak and it’s a constant work in progress. That wasn’t just a tool or a switch, it was a journey of coming into this place where I don’t feel like I have to prove myself, at least most of the time. That’s been the biggest gift for me in doing this work.

That’s a big permission slip because we feel like we all definitely have chased that approval stamp quite heavily and it is exhausting. It creates the wrong kind of energy.

We don't always have to be in pain in order to be enough. We have to begin to teach our bodies what enough is without the pain first. Click To Tweet

When I say it’s a work in progress, it’s like a work in progress. I had this talk with myself too, and it’s a constant journey, I’m constantly coming back to, “I’m trying to prove myself in this situation.” How can I come back to my worth? How can I come back to my humanness? Just like that permission slip to be myself coming back to that energy. It’s a daily reminder, especially when you’ve lived your whole life in an industry and a society that tells you differently.

I’ve found that self-development is so much about learning something new. It’s unlearning to be like.

We’re learning tools, but those tools are just things that our body already knows how to do most of the time, which is to support your wellbeing and your safety inside of yourself. It’s like relearning. I had this conversation with my client and we were re-teaching our systems how to feel safe and that they’re enough. It’s not that they aren’t enough and they need to learn how to be enough. It’s like we’re relearning. We’re re-teaching. They already know but they need to be reminded.

Thank you so much, Taylor, for this conversation. Thank you for going on the path. I know that path isn’t easy and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. It is so much more rewarding and fulfilling than anything I’ve ever done prior to not. Thanks for making a difference in the world. It answers a need 100%. This is why this show is up and running. This is why I stepped out of my own space of comfortability and gotten over some shame and fears to ignite that renaissance that we so desperately need.

I can feel that from you. How true this is and I just want to say that I appreciate you taking that step forward to hold this space and to make all this possible. I can truly feel your vulnerability and your desire to create this change.

Thank you so much for reading.

Resources for Taylor:

About Taylor Behringer

PTR 74 | Space Of AcceptanceTaylor Behringer is a life-long dancer, mom, healer, and dance educator who specializes in helping professional dancers heal their relationship with their bodies. She is a Certified Breathwork Facilitator as well as a Somatic Food And Body Coach who guides dancers in using the wisdom of their own bodies to shed beliefs & programming that puts them at war with their body, to create a new way of living & dancing that supports their relationship their bodies.

 

 

 

 

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  — Susanne shares a quick thought that came to her after hearing a quote. Who told you that you are not deserving of what you want? She remembers how this feeling showed up in her life and how other people’s limiting thoughts would so easily be accepted as hers. Watch the episode here: Listen to the podcast here:   Who told you that you are not deserving of what you want? And I’m back. […]

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Past Episodes 

There is a better way to pursue ballet at the professional level. Instead of dancers pushing beyond their body’s limits, there is a healthier way to train your body, your mind and your spirit to soar. To become the best at your craft, you must be healthy. The mentality of surviving to make a performance perfect is an old paradigm that needs to change. As athletes, dancers must thrive in order to shine and connect with their audience. This new approach, leads to fulfillment, strength and longevity. It allows you to give more of your heart and soul on stage, creating an unforgettable experience that moves your audience. And that’s the whole pointe. 

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