Susanne dives into her insight of how her hometown has changed, or more how she has changed and that perspective has shifted.
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Hello, and welcome to another episode of the Pointe To Rise podcast. My name is Susanne, and I’m your host today. I am right now sitting on the rooftop, overlooking Berlin, Germany, watching the sunset. And I thought I’m just going to keep this tradition up for a little bit while I’m still traveling. And I’m recording for you with this kind of overview.
So let me tell you about my biggest takeaway of the week that I spent here in Berlin. It’s not just about setting boundaries, but it is that our family, who raised us, our family is who we love dearly. Sometimes, our family is a circle of people who have to set very clear boundaries around.
For me, that boundary was very clearly set over the past three days where I encountered energy that is not in my vibrational circle anymore. I found that I pleased everybody with showing up and being present. After just 30 minutes, I found myself having to get up and walk out and take a break. Go on a walk and have a really good conversation and discovery with myself about this is. For who I am anymore, nor do I want to be that other person anymore.
Yet I love them dearly, but I need to step away from them and their energy, from their mindset, from their beliefs, because they do not align with what I believe anymore. And the more and more I shared with them who I was and what I believed in and asked different questions, the more extensive friction.
It didn’t become confrontational in any way? But I found myself getting very restless, very weak, and wanted to do things like eating crap, or I didn’t want to work out, or I didn’t want to do something good for me. And I felt myself getting sucked into this hurricane of negative energy of talking about problems all the time, saying this is the way it is settling without finding any solutions.
I think I also discovered why I left Germany. That was because it seemed that the mindset over here is very much black and white. And I don’t want to say that that’s necessarily a bad thing. There are very many great things about black and white. Only that black and white doesn’t fit me anymore.
I am looking for gray. I am looking for solutions every possible second, and I am looking for choices and not what I believe society or industry or other people are asking me to be or what kind of a box I should fit into.
Therefore I had a hard time. I found it also very challenging to watch my dear close family that you haven’t spent much time with over the past 20 years.
These limiting beliefs and fighting for them with tooth and nail repeatedly stayed the way they knew and said they couldn’t change. Other people have to do that for them. And I felt myself getting not upset about it. But it took so much energy out of me that I not only had to step away, but I had to remove myself.
So what’s the lesson here. The lesson is that I have to, regardless of how much I do care and love them, I can only change myself and how I behave and how I react, and how I choose to show up. I cannot change where they’re at. Neither will I try anymore to put out any suggestions? Hoping that they will take a nugget here or there and understand where I’m coming from and where I’m at. It hurts as I love them, with all of my heart, for they are my family. Some of them raised me, yet we have become such different people with such different beliefs that it doesn’t align anymore. And I find that painful In the beginning.
When I had a few hours now to calm down and understand what’s happening and look at it from the outside in and not react anymore, I’m not 100% sure yet what the solution is. The answer right now is loving them from afar, not having or investing time into conversations, physical energy exchange, but watching and loving them from afar.
If you find yourself in the circumstances where you have conversations, and these conversations are about problems and pointing out the things that are not working well without having any solutions.
I mean, if that’s where you’re at and that’s not where you want to be, then you need to start either removing yourself or spending less time with that and choosing what you are taking in. The people that you surround yourself with are one of the most important things. You can decide and choose, and that will help you to level up or drawn down.
Let’s compare that to a company or your circle of friends or whatever that is if you feel like you have to settle in order to fit. Then you’re not going to live your most powerful life. It would be best if you gave yourself that chance to discover.
You need to understand who you are before you can perhaps help others or decide to move away or move towards people you want to learn from or be inspired by.
That was hard. I mentioned this to a friend today that I am grateful for the lesson because honestly, you guys, I, spoken to my kids like this.
I had conversations like this over and over and over again with friends and family. Where we just pointed fingers at everybody else for what was not working in our life. I just don’t want to live that way anymore. And if you’re listening to this podcast, I think you also have that feeling that tugging on your soul, that you want some kind of change.
Sometimes we just don’t even know what that change looks like. Sometimes that change starts with not taking your phone in your hands and looking at everybody else on Instagram. Sometimes that change is taking care of your needs first when you get up versus pleasing everybody else. Sometimes that change starts with listening to different podcasts or people that Inspire different perspectives in you. This action will light a spark in you again, where you don’t settle for what you think you can get. But when you go out and get what you want.
Okay. While I’m looking at the sun going down right here, over the roofs here in Berlin. I’m sending you so much love, and I hope that you find it a tiny little spark, a slight little nudge in yourself that moves you forward. That one led you to settle that lets you take on different perspectives and other beliefs that will push you forward because you don’t have to settle. Never, ever settle.
I’m sending you so much love and till next time.
So much ❤
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About Susanne Puerschel
Susanne, Founder of Pointe To Rise, an Empowerment society for dancers and other artists, Wellness Entrepreneur, podcast host, former international ballerina, and an experienced principal chief executive officer had the privilege to grow up behind the iron curtain in Berlin, Germany.
She’s dedicating her time now, after working in cooperate America and running her own businesses, to building community among dancers and artists, providing mindset and high-performance coaching, and building a media company that will be the springboard to revitalizing the Arts.